My ex did show up at mediation today, much to my surprise. Unfortunately, one of his friends was there too for his own mediation, and my ex spent the entire waiting time saying things to this guy for my benefit just to get to me. I just ignored him.
I really don’t know how well the whole thing went. I requested separate mediation, because I just can’t be in the same room as my ex, and they granted it. He denied everything I had in my documentation, which I wasn’t surprised about. I am asking for full custody with visitation for him one day a week for 3 out of the 4 weeks. He’s requesting 50/50 shared custody, with the kids spending one week at his house, and one week at mine. These are completely opposite wishes for custody. So we have to wait for the mediator to come to a conclusion about her recommendation, and we’ll receive her decision in the mail. I’ve allowed her to talk to my counselor for more information, and I hope that helps. But I honestly don’t know. In small increments, my ex can pull off looking like an upstanding guy.
Although I have put this in the Lord’s hands, I am extremely discouraged. All the preparation I had for this day may have been for naught because my ex is so skilled in manipulation. And just being there and being around him, listening to him tell the other guy how rotten I was in not so many words, made me want full custody even more. I don’t know what I’ll do if my children turn out just like him. And it makes me wonder even more what I ever saw in him….
Lord, I pray for your will. You know the desires of my heart, but please let me be accepting of your plans for me and my children.