I totally hate that I did share that much in wide open space. It’s one thing if I was totally faceless and nameless. But friends are reading here, and my picture and name exists right here next to my dirty laundry. And it’s so easy to make a decision as big as this now, when I really have no choice anyway, but what about when I’ve met someone and things get serious? I really don’t know how I’ll deal then, will I be able to stick to my guns? Will I want to?
As for those of you reading this that know me, I am not going to mention this outside of my blog. I’m a little bit embarassed. On Saturday I was just totally convicted, and knew I needed to write it out to keep the plan in motion. But unlike other blogs I’ve had where I’ve been able to spill my guts, this one is more revealing for the above reasons. So I spilled my guts here in my regular “in your face” fashion, but didn’t think of how I’d feel when people I’m still getting to know would read about my most private life dealings. So my face is a little red right now. At this moment I wish I were faceless again!
Anyway, today is Valentine’s Day. And I do love this Hallmark holiday. I’ve been pretty good natured about the fact that I don’t have a romantic valentine (though it still kind of sucks!). The new guy “just isn’t interested”. He never said so, but I’ve read the book…. That’s ok, it gives me the perfect chance to hold off on any kind of relationship and finally be at the point where I am ok with being single. I finally realize that everything I’ve been told about enjoying being single, and focusing on myself right now is true. I’m just not in as big of a hurry to move on as I was before, as my needs have changed. Before it was like I was in competion with my ex, now I could care less. I’m actually better off than his current situation, anyways!
But as far as valentines, I do have my kids! I got them some little treats and made them each a valentine card. I bought myself some daffodils from Trader Joes, and they just opened up completely today. Nothing can bring some sunshine to your morning like a bunch of big yellow blossoms! Summer has the day off school today, so we hung out at Aroma’s this morning and totally pigged out! I had their famous breakfast burrito, she had a massive blueberry muffin. And of course our hot drinks. Then we went shopping and had lunch with my parents at Checkers. Now, I’m supposed to be working, but I thought I’d take a break before work. Hard life, I know! I’m just so full, my diet has been completely sabotaged! And it’s taking all I have to not just curl up and take a nap. This is the downfalls of having a home office. There are times when it is just too hard to get serious!
Anyway, I’m going to sign off and go put my head back in the sand…. Oh yeah, and work!